And she shall be named DOLORES!

Often, I find that any minutely unsettling observation can grow into an internal tirade of enumerating every injustice I've encountered in life, a spark to an uncontrollable flame, eventually leading to a release of previously unbeknown negativity wherein I bawl my eyes out for several hours, then am suddenly settled by a cathartic feeling as gratitude sweeps away my tears; how lucky I am to be alive that I should be able to experience anything at all! Then I get superpowers. I create fire with the sheer force of will, float in mid-air, control the weather with my emotions, the works! A fantastic culmination of what years upon years of Saturday mornings spent with shoddy 4kids dubs and playing and re-playing (and re-re-re-re-re-re-replaying) Final Fantasys has drilled into my mind (and I LOVE IT!).

            My biggest role model/mental image of the ideal man/why I will most likely be a crazy lonely cat lady someday 

So, why am I writing this instead of the things I should be doing (one of 2 problem sets, CS assignment, studying for any of my two upcoming midterms, in case it's a source of any wonder)? Perhaps this way, I can one day look back at my thoughts, or whatever it is that buzzes around my head at times, and remember this time in my life, and then look back at it in regret, realizing that had I spent all this time getting my work done instead of wasting time, I might work for Google or Microsoft rather than patrolling the streets of San Francisco for scraps. There's also a slight hope, that maybe someone will one day stumble upon this page, and, from sheer boredom, read its contents (I'm sorry in advance), and actually find some sentence (oh come on, a word at least!) which makes some sort of impact. Anyway, what better place to do this thing than a tiny secluded blog space lost in a universe of millions anonymous Internet users filling petabytes upon petabytes with equally useless banter in the hopes that 1) it will be intercepted by extraterrestrials or 2) sometime in the distant future, our words will be an important glimpse into a speck of human history and this, our age, shall be dubbed The Unenlightenment (to the distant future people: may our primitive ways inspire you to find something ancient within yourselves, the soul speck which makes us all one, and, if you have the technology, allow me to drop a hint regarding my curiosity about the future). That is why we write blogs, isn't it?

Final point, which probably should have been the first point, since it is the title of the blog: not that I mind typing to myself (can't say I haven't done it before), but I prefer to pretend that this is aimed at at least one other person. This hypothetical person shall be named Dolores, and she is my blog. She is ears, but really eyes since this is typed. She is also a kind old lady who can teach me things about myself through my interactions with her. It's all very self-serving. And she is Dolores, because that is a fitting name for an old lady, therefore she does not, under any circumstances, go by Lolita.